Thursday, March 24, 2005

I have lost all faith in humanity

I just saw a commercial for little fake stick on jewel things for small electronic accessories, that means ipods, cell phones, and the likes for the few morons that read this. this however isn't even close ti the reason why i have given up. I just watched had the sound off, but the shiny things caught my eye and as soon as i looked up the words "BLING it on!" flashed on the screen. These words were accompanied by the stupidest looking white girl i have ever seen. She was flanked on either side by equally idiotic lookng idiots. The word bling has now lost all meaning to me when some lame ass infomercial can so carelessly paste BLING onto a shitty product and market it with the lamest looking white girls who obviously don't even have anyone to call with their cell phones, besides their parents so they can get a picked up from the library where they are probably using their ipods to listen to outdated popular music like the the partridge family and the macarena. These are the kids that BLING up their electronics because they need to stand out in the crowd for something, and we all know it's not gonna be because of their shining personalities. Hell, it seems to me if you're gonna give something a name as shitty as Bling it up (which relaly seems like a more of an action than a name) you might as well market it with people who dont look and sound equally as awkward as my mom when they say the word BLING. And i think most of all, don't imply that something blings when it doesn't. Fuck, there is nothing i hate more than imroper use of incorrect gramer and words that are made up in the first place by chumps that you know for certain memorized their rudements and shit during their study breaks. Moral of this rant: nerds can't use slang and get away with it so don't try or else i will personally nerd slap the shit out of you.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

I don't give a what?

I'm sure most by now have figured out or already know what facebook is. For me though, it is probably the worst thing that could have happened to me right now. For a kid who already procrastinates to no end is like a flesh eating virus, the kind that starts eating your flesh before you it touches your body, nay, before you can even see it. So now here I am writing in the blog instead of looking at peoples profiles on facebook because at least when I'm writing something I feel somewhat productive. The main topics today will be facebook and if I have time, or room, chick flicks. To start, facebook is one of the greatest wastes of time I have come across in my life so far. At least for now it is. It allows you to learn about people at your school by viewing their profile and pair it with a picture that was no doubt taken while they were blitzed out of their mind. See that arm cropped out of the left side of the picture? That is either a) The hook-up from that night b) The best friend c) Some chucker who was wearing a cool hat, had a class with the person, looked like someone they knew etc. One of my favorite things to do with facebook was to go find everyone that went to my highschool whos on the FB now and look at their pictures. This was either followed by a "HEY!!!!! IT'S _______!!!!!!!!" while i frantically clickd on their name to add them to my friends list or me screaming "FUCK!!!!! I HATED _______", throwing my computer against the wall and then slowly realizing that I may have over reacted. It also allows for music snobs like my friend Eric and myself to put every obscure band we know in our favorite music part of our profile just so that people know we are hot shit. I now click on some of the bands that I have in mine so that I can see if anyone else has them. Usually it's just me or Eric who has them, but every once in a while someone else will pop up and I usually find myself thinking not hey I really want to be friends with this person, but what the hell does this sumbitch know about so and so? Then I cry myself to sleep because I'll never have any friends becasue I just push people away. What? Perhaps my favorite part of facebook though are the groups. Here's an opportunity to create groups with well thought out hilarious names that let other people know just how much of a fanactic you are about something, whether it be alcohol, hilary duff, or being a sweet bad ass. The best part of it all though is that you can make these groups as exclusive as you want. The lame ones are made so that anyone can join. The more exclusive ones you must apply to and then be accepts by the administrators of said group. But then it goes to a whole new level. There are invite only groups. These are my favorite because they encourage complete exclusivity and discrimination. There are two types of these: one where its invite only and another where its invite only but when searching for groups you cant even see it. It's invisable, shaaaaaaaaahhhhh. I don't undestand why anyone would go for the invisible one though. Why wouldn't you want people seeing a group that they have absolutly no chance of getting in to? Why wouldn't you want to hang it over their heads that only the best can be in this certain group? It's so deliciously cruel, I love it. Anyways, this got huge in a short time. no room for chick flicks. Perhaps I'll touch on them later. For now though I have successfully wasted 20 minutes of homework time. Hoorah.

Peace bitches,
Ben

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

It's time

I can't even remember the last time I blogged. I think it was about hatin on napoleon wannabe's. Anyways, let me start by saying that those people still suck. And the creator and co-writer of this blog is now dangerously close to being grouped in with them now that he finally broke down and saw the movie. Also, it seems like I should start blogging again cause alot goes on in second semester. My hatred for school and everything related to it is steadily climing and is about to hit an all time high. As some of you know, a few people on the swim team are going to nationals. More than a few actually, cause we are all fuckin studs and sweet bad asses. But all that aside, it screws the shit out of my schedule. we leave the tuesday of the last week before spring break, which on our campus is also known as mid terms. For all you dimwitted suckas out there that either didn't have an education, ever, or have done everything they can to forget it, midterms mean projects, papers, and perhaps most importantly, mid term tests. Of course, no one in the music department really gives half of a shit about athletics, so I have two weeks to get three weeks worth of work done, and if that doesn't kill me, then I will do the honors myself. For those of you that don't know me that well, this is perhaps the worst thing that could happen to me because I have the unique ability to turn about an hours worth of work into about 3 hours worth. That's right, I'm a procrastinater extraordinare which is something I usually take pride in, but right now it's literally scaring the shit out of me. I'm crapping in my pants right now just thinking about it. Thank God for febreeze and Lysol. Anyways, I'm now thinking about dropping out of school and becoming one of either two things: A professional athelete, although I'm not sure what kid I'd be. Swimmer or triathlete are prolly my best bets, but that would prolly require alot more work than I think and it's also probably extremely hard to succeed in the business of professional atheltics. My second option would be to start up a recording studio. I'd more than likely have to get a job at a studio before I could own my own and that might require a degree in sound engineering or something to that effect, but it's also possible that I could just get hired based off of my good looks and all around awesomeness. I would then go on to sign extremely promising up and coming artists after I got my own studio and then drop them as soon as they hit it big so that they would never tarnish the good nname of my label with stardome. This is prbably the better option of the two because it would also allow for me to be as lazy as I wanted to be which is a definite benefit (whoa, check that rhyme!!!) I like this idea the best. That's about all I got for now. Hopefully future blogs won't be as bad as this one, but I'm still tryin to get back into the swing of things. I'm out, wada tah my damies.

-Ben